Dragon's Library Fiction Contest on December 14, 1998
Category: WoT Humor

Renewed Ramblin'Sanity: A Sul, A Dam, And An StD

Robert Jordan: Bloody writer's flaming cramp. I just had to try to grasp saidin and now I'm stuck on ideas!
Harriet: (tug) Hrmph! (tug)
RJ: [blinks] "You've given me an idea, Harry."
Harriet: Don't call me Harry! [promptly slaps him]
RJ: And the title for the ninth book!

Renewed Ramblin'Sanity
Chapter 1: Sul and Dam makes an StD

Last in the long-lost episode of Ramblin'Sanity, Rand had been stuck within a male a'dam and his closest friends had been within the belly of a grolm named Trouble. Due to other things, Kiriath is on assignment --namely this-- so the grolm is no longer a bother, but a worthless little pile of hard-shelled eyes laying on the ground. Eyes that Rand sees and picks up, channeling the Power through them.

Rand: I see you, sul'dam.
Sul'dam: Shaddup, Lena!
Rand: Lena?
SD: My name for you, dear damane.
Rand: 'Least I'm not a demone.
SD: Ah, but you are. Demones are bad and ought to be...
Rand: Old joke. Bad. Bad!

[Rand retorts the whiplash through the link and promptly lops off his own hand, the whip having had a razor edge. SD runs away, to get more of its kind.]

Rand smiles smugly: Being tav'e'ren is nice.
Bashere: (in Rand's memory) Being tav'e'ren isn't always...
[Rand's eyes grow huge] Oh crud.

[SD returns to the ship's deck, but literally smashes through it.]

Rand: Sul'dam?

[SD would have shaken its head had it had one, but a Desperate Pun comes into play and it morphs. Into a Star Destroyer.]

Rand: Huhn?
SD: The Master Vader will see you now.

To be continued in...
Part 2: The Parody has only Bepun

OR

Part 2: Here We Go Again

Note: I just ..need.. to bring these back. For those who categorize them: stash them in their own category. I'm not sure how large they'll be in the future, and I'm bringing back the series, hopefully.

Kiriath



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